Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Lost & Found

Yesterday was "Day 21". The first day of the second half of this journey. A momentous occasion for sure.

I lost my pedometer.
I lost my patience.
I lost my temper.
I lost control.
I almost lost my mind.

At three o'clock this morning, I cried out to the Lord. "Please help me! I can't live another day like yesterday. I just can't. What can I do? I don't want the sun to rise..."

He seemed to be shushing me. But not merely as a mother tenderly shushes a crying child. He seemed to be providing the remedy for my plight: as if to say, "Cari, just shush...don't speak and your day will be fine."

It was the middle of the night, and thoughts are strange in the drowsy darkness. But I could swear He quoted "Princess Diaries". As if to lovingly encourage this daughter of a King: "A Princess never raises her voice. She speaks in hushed tones."

As the light of day beckoned me to consciousness a few hours later, I remembered the midnight conversation. I calmly brushed my teeth and happily made my bed. When I was prayed up - good and ready - I ventured down the hall to utter my first whispered words of the day. "Kiddos, it's time to get up."

After a few minutes, different children began to ask why we were all whispering. I had no idea why THEY were whispering. Personally, I had taken a bit of a vow. I didn't really have to respond to the inquisition concerning my hushed tones. One child spoke up on my behalf and supposed that my "throat was soar like last year from singing in that radio thingie". Another more accurate, less tender soul offered the theory that I perhaps lost my voice yesterday in all the fit throwing. Indeed I had.

Lost it.

Today I found it...and I kept it under considerable restraint.

I found control.
I found temperance.
I found patience.
I found my pedometer.

Within the first hour of the day, there was literally fire, pestilence and flood in my kitchen. And I responded with hushed tones of peace and grace. After I extinguished the flames, swept away the debris, and mopped up the mess of such an unthinkable disaster, I thought about the supernatural calmness that had surely possessed me. I felt empowered to face any further frustration with similar courage and quietness. And so I did.

All the day long.

THIS is how we know the power of the cross. THIS is evidence that Christ is risen indeed! I navigated the torrent of circumstance and no one heard a peep from me. Thank You, Jesus! Victory!