I've been frustrated for weeks... years really, that Sundays "never go right". They're always stressful. When will I get a break? Consequently, I have been reading a book entitled "The REST of God" by Mark Buchanan. It has challenged my thoughts and actions toward Sabbath...not just a day, but an attitude. While preparing a Bible Study on manna, I realized I was totally missing "it". I knew the story of the children of Israel griping in the dessert. I knew the structure of the manna provision: little heavenly frosted flakes would be available each morning like dew. But as the sun dries the dew, the manna would disappear in the first warmth of sunshine. The manna lasted one day. No hoarding. No planning ahead. No leftovers. But I still missed it.
Exodus 16:4-5 "Then the lord said to Moses, 'I will rain down bread from heaven for you. The people are to go out each day and gather enough for that day. In this way I will test them and see whether they will follow my instructions. On the sixth day they are to prepare what they bring in, and that is to be twice as much as they gather on the other days."
In my constant quest for supreme rest, I realized that I don't do Sabbath right because I don't do my other six days right...on two levels: spiritually and physically. Spiritually, God did all this to teach the Israelites that "Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God." (Deuteronomy 8) So there is a picture for me to live out where I go daily, probably in the morning, and gather the words God would have me live by. Six mornings of gathering. Sabbath is an overflow day. Our day of corporate worship should not be the ONE time I try to gather truth to sustain me. Then, even if I'm convicted on Sunday, and repent and rise early on Monday to taste and see that the Lord is good, it's only meant for that day. By Tuesday it will be stale with maggots.....(I don't make this stuff up). So I pray I would discipline myself to receive daily bread.
Then in the physical sense. God set the example of working six days and resting on the seventh. It recently occurred to me that I tend to start grabbing "down-time" on Friday night and Saturday because I'm so scared that there won't be any rest on Sunday. Culture? And in the end, there is always work to be done on Sunday. So I tried a different approach this week. I worked each day...Monday through Saturday...dawn to dusk. On Saturday I ran some errands and shopped by myself during the afternoon and then came home and purposefully attempted to finish the week able to say "every thing is good". I worked my little capunkus off. I sweat, and I huffed, and I ached, and I sweat. (It was 85 and muggy here yesterday) When I went to bed (and as Tim would say "began my day") my heart and mind were set on things above, my house was clean, clothes were laid out, food was prepared, and all my responsibilities for church were solidified. I rested well. And today was restful. The morning was busy, but I had a different attitude. This afternoon I fought the urge to get a jump on laundry duties for tomorrow. I fought the urge to do anything but rest. I finally put productivity on the back burner for ONE day. Whoopie! I feel like a struggling, stubborn child, to whom God asks, "How long will you refuse to keep my commands and my instructions?" (Ex 16:28) To quote my father-in-law: "The Good Lord ain't a stupid man".
Philip has been so busy working two jobs with little bouts of hunting and football, then trying to keep healthy relationships afloat, that I think he's wading through his own journey of learning Sabbath Rest. We talked tonight for a long while. We're strained. I think we miss our old lifestyle....our silent slavery where we were blinded to our financial bondage, but we hung out together all the time and shared our oblivion gaily. Our eyes are opened now, there is freedom of knowledge and will, but we seem to be shackled in this debtors' prison across the cell from one another. We want the freedom that God is providing through grace and obedience, and we don't want to go back to "Egypt". It's just hard. It was more fun --foolish fun -- we would be fools to go back. God wants his children to rest in Him and remember all that He has freed us from. We need a break from our work, or our work will lead us right back to where we don't want to be. It's late, and this is making more sense in my heart than it is on the screen. Good thing a new day is dawning. Perhaps we'll take another run at it another day.
As far as this week, everyone is completely looking forward to getting away for a few days and enjoying the holidays with my extended family. I pray the Lord will continue to teach us His ways and give us strength to walk in them....DAILY. And as we pass the signs for "Rest Stop" and have to explain to the kids that "back in the olden day..." we'll be quick to thank the Lord for His goodness and mercy...and His rest.
